Quivering

All my life, but most especially over this last year, I have been amazed to discover what incredibly wonderful parents God has blessed me with. Some very dear friends of mine, who appear to be members of perfectly "normal" conservative Christian families, battle every day with trauma and scars from their upbringing. And I'm not talking about children of "broken homes". I'm talking about families who truly and earnestly seek to follow God's direction in raising their children.

How much damage can be caused by a slight calibration error in a projectile weapon? What if the calibration is application of Scripture to life, and that projectile weapon is the well-being of your son or daughter? I hurt for the agony of my friends. I grieve for the despair of the parents who look on as things begin to crumble and wonder what they did wrong when all they ever sought was God's will in their families. My heart breaks for them ... but it bleeds for those sons and daughters whose lives will be scarred by this unintentional torture lovingly administered by their own parents.

Recently a friend pointed me to the Quivering Daughters blog (look through their FAQ to get a general idea of the blog's aim). It is in some ways relieving and in other ways more painful to realize that these few lives I've touched personally are not alone in their sorrow. It's staggering — grievous — depressing! — to see how widely these ideas and practices reach, and how thoroughly devastating misguided love can be. O Lord, the things done in Your name! — and by people whose motives are pure!

I'm glad God knows what He's doing with our lives, because this confusion leaves me reeling.

By the way, please don't ask me to whom this article might refer. I have some specific people in mind, but the truths here are general. If you think they might apply to you, they might. If they don't, they don't. My intent is not to point fingers, but to raise awareness of these situations and of this wonderful resource — and perhaps to raise a few eyebrows as well.

Sin, Grace, Forgiveness, and Love

Are we happy plastic people under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness and smiles that hide our pain?
But if the invitation's open to every heart that has been broken,
Maybe then we'd close the curtain on our stained-glass masquerade.

— Casting Crowns, Stained Glass Masquerade

Wake up, Christians!

How many times have I heard the phrase, "There but by the grace of God go I" referring to the depravity of the human heart? You hear about murders, rapes, robberies, and the list goes on ... and you think soberly to yourself, "only the grace of God has preserved me from such wickedness." WHAT ARROGANCE! That thought comes from the heart of the Pharisee in the temple, thanking God that he is so much more righteous than "that tax collector over there". Thank you, God, that my slacking off at work isn't as evil as the Bank of America robbery! Thank you, God, that my lust isn't as wicked as John Doe's adultery! Thank you, God, that my unbridled temper is less sinful than the latest drive-by shooting!

The harshest words Jesus ever spoke were not to "sinners" or unbelievers — they were to the religious leaders of his day, to the Wesleys and Luthers and Sprouls and Grahams and Spurgeons — the men that all the world revered for their righteousness. He did not revile their good works or their godliness. He reviled their arrogance and hypocrisy — the arrogance and hypocrisy that I see in so many Christians today. As you read this, you who "asked Jesus into your heart" at the age of five or six, you who grew up in a Christian family, you who would not dare to steal cookies from the cookie jar, you who teach Sunday School and attend every prayer meeting and travel on mission trips twice a year, you who have been praised openly and secretly for your godly life ... do you not realize that your wickedness is every bit as damning as Esau's and Judas's and Hitler's and Cain's? Can you not see that YOUR blasphemy, YOUR malice, YOUR lust, YOUR greed, YOUR hatred, YOUR envy, and YOUR rebellion against the God of the universe is what put His Son on the cross? Who cares what John Sinner says or does? If you only knew your own heart, you'd be on your knees imploring God for forgiveness and begging John Sinner not to hate you for the evil in your heart.

I have seen in many people's lives — including my own — a fear to be open, a fear to admit brokenness, a fear to acknowledge that (guess what) CHRISTIANS ARE NOT PERFECT! Where does the fear come from? It's the fear of being rejected by those who are somehow "more godly", the fear of being despised for sharing the radical depravity of the human race, the fear of becoming a victim to Christian arrogance. And I am sorry to say that I have also seen the justification for that fear; I have seen Christians who more quickly judge behavior than character, who will judge the heart by the actions instead of the actions by the heart — Christians who would (in analogy) scold someone for attempting suicide rather than offer their own shirt as a tourniquet.

We need Christians who are strong enough to admit their weaknesses, Christians who are willing to expose their flaws, Christians who can say, "The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?" The church is desperate for believers who put aside their arrogance, take up their cross, and follow CHRIST instead of their own filthy rags of self-righteousness. Christians who know they're broken need friends who know their own brokenness. Then only are we safe to acknowledge our brokenness and so seek healing together.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer says so excellently in his essay on Confession and Communion,

According to Jesus’ promise every Christian believer can hear the confession of another. But will the other understand us? Might not another believer be so far beyond us in the Christian life that she or he would only turn away from us without understanding our personal sins? Whoever lives beneath the cross of Jesus, and has discerned in the cross of Jesus the utter ungodliness of all people and of their own hearts, will find there is no sin that can ever be unfamiliar. Whoever has once been appalled by the horror of their own sin, which nailed Jesus to the cross, will no longer be appalled by even the most serious sin of another Christian; rather they know the human heart from the cross of Jesus.

Waiting for Love

I just got home today from spending the weekend with some friends. I drove up to their house on Friday to help them produce a film to enter in the 24-hour Christian film contest on Saturday. Our film, Waiting for Love, was the 41st of 72 entries to be submitted — and we submitted it between 3:30 and 3:45 AM Sunday morning. Understandably, I am tired and will be hitting the sack as soon as this entry is posted. However, I hope to soon post a little more about this movie.

You can watch the movie in the player below. If you are unable or unwilling to view it via YouTube, contact me privately and I'll see what I can do.



My roles in this film were cowriter, director of photography, and editor/color-corrector/grader. The music that fit so perfectly was taken almost unaltered from one of Digital Juice's StackTraxx albums.